Performance may so intertwine falsely with love that we cannot conceive of being loved unless we have performed rightly. Or worse, we come to believe that not performing earns rejection, so even if someone gives us love, we think we didn't deserve it and either won't receive love offered, or false guilt assails.*
Yes. It's time for an update of what I learned in the GROW class. Last week and this week was an explanation of the false self, another obstacle to being more aware of God's presence in our lives.
false self: untrue, not real, fake and/or imaginary version of one's character and being.
The explanation came to life in two stick figure drawings in my notes. One is labeled "Glittering Image" and the other is labeled "the Beast." We waver between both of these images throughout our lives, but neither of them is our true self. The Glittering Image captures who we desire ourselves to be. It's more than just the mask we wear to portray a "good" person, it's the little and big things we choose to do for the attention that leads to love from others (or so we think). The Beast on the other hand is who we envision ourselves to really be because of how much we hide. "We know who we really are," we tell ourselves, "but if anyone found out what would happen?" The answer is rejection, and with that comes some form of death.
When the Glittering Image fails, we often resort to the Beast. We lose our job, for instance, and then decide, "to heck with it," and begin to wallow in our grief. Some turn to drinking, others to cutting, etc. etc. Or maybe we enjoy the Beast version of ourselves because we realize the Glittering Image (our only other option, in our opinion) is too difficult.
Yet the reality is that they are both lies, as they are both merely images. Neither of them portray who we truly are, that is, a child of God.
The cool thing about God is He will love us in whatever state we find ourselves. But as my old youth pastor used to say, "He accepts you where you are, but He does not intend for you to stay that way!" Jesus puts it this way (The Message style):
The unforced rhythms of grace. The child of God has not done anything to earn the title child of God (see Romans 6:23), unlike the other two images that we've thus far discussed. We are to come to recognize simply who we are. There is freedom in this recognition, and yet it also marks the beginning of a battle. We wrestle with the understanding of our free gift of grace, mainly because there is a foe named Satan who will prod us just enough for us to think the false self works (oh snap to the double entendre!).
The main way Satan does this is by telling us that we must earn our salvation. We must perform well or else God will not keep loving us. Paul writes:
And then this guy John writes (on behalf of Jesus):
We keep falling into the trap of performance, and the video at the beginning captures that well. We had watched it in class and talked about the message it was sending; to earn respect (or love) was only through winning. And yet the discussion was followed up with the important question, "Who won the NBA championship 3 years ago?" No one could answer, even though that was only three seasons past.
We talked about how much we really can't do anything on our own. It's why Jesus came. But it also extends into the reasons behind His baptism--that only He could fulfill the Law for us. This was mind-boggling! Why would Jesus need to be baptized after all? John the Baptist was baptizing for the repentance of sins, yet we know Christ to be blameless. Or how about the fact that even our prayers do not come from us, but from the workings of the Holy Spirit?
Yet we still do things. How do we prove our faith except through works? An important time to clarify.
He did not say, "If you obey my commands, I [Jesus] will love you." This is a logical fallacy. While let's say, there is no cloud in sight therefore it must not be raining, we could not say it is not raining therefore there is no cloud in sight. Our actions come in response to the recognition of our true self. We are children of God who are unconditionally loved by the Father. How then, could we not obey Him?
Works are done not to earn this salvation, but works are our effort (albeit weak) to love Him back. The battle resides in where our motivations lie behind the things we do. The crazy thing with all of this, too, is that when we become the new creation, Christ calls us toward rest, not work (read the Matthew 11:28 verse again). Really, He just wants us to be with Him, to walk with Him, as it was originally intended. Remember? Remember the intimacy that Adam and Eve had in the garden? Remember Enoch, who walked with God?
But the further away we get from the original plan, the harder it can be to remember, eh? It's when we resort back to the squeaky wheel mentality, "Well if I just do this, then I'll feel like I'm worth something."
Christ is calling us to just be. He has given us gifts and talents, dreams and desires, and the hope is for them to manifest so fully in our lives that we get lost in being. In being with Him, in knowing Him well..
I don't know how to conclude this, because there is so much that can be said. Hopefully this was enough to get the conversation/thinking started. Maybe you can understand why, too, I love this class so much!
* The Transformation of the Inner Man.
** Merton's Palace of Nowhere.
Yes. It's time for an update of what I learned in the GROW class. Last week and this week was an explanation of the false self, another obstacle to being more aware of God's presence in our lives.
false self: untrue, not real, fake and/or imaginary version of one's character and being.
The explanation came to life in two stick figure drawings in my notes. One is labeled "Glittering Image" and the other is labeled "the Beast." We waver between both of these images throughout our lives, but neither of them is our true self. The Glittering Image captures who we desire ourselves to be. It's more than just the mask we wear to portray a "good" person, it's the little and big things we choose to do for the attention that leads to love from others (or so we think). The Beast on the other hand is who we envision ourselves to really be because of how much we hide. "We know who we really are," we tell ourselves, "but if anyone found out what would happen?" The answer is rejection, and with that comes some form of death.
When the Glittering Image fails, we often resort to the Beast. We lose our job, for instance, and then decide, "to heck with it," and begin to wallow in our grief. Some turn to drinking, others to cutting, etc. etc. Or maybe we enjoy the Beast version of ourselves because we realize the Glittering Image (our only other option, in our opinion) is too difficult.
Yet the reality is that they are both lies, as they are both merely images. Neither of them portray who we truly are, that is, a child of God.
The cool thing about God is He will love us in whatever state we find ourselves. But as my old youth pastor used to say, "He accepts you where you are, but He does not intend for you to stay that way!" Jesus puts it this way (The Message style):
Are you tired? Worn out? Burned out on religion? Come to me. Get away with me and you'll recover your life. I'll show you how to take a real rest. Walk with me and work with me—watch how I do it. Learn the unforced rhythms of grace. I won't lay anything heavy or ill-fitting on you. Keep company with me and you'll learn to live freely and lightly. (Matthew 11:28)
The unforced rhythms of grace. The child of God has not done anything to earn the title child of God (see Romans 6:23), unlike the other two images that we've thus far discussed. We are to come to recognize simply who we are. There is freedom in this recognition, and yet it also marks the beginning of a battle. We wrestle with the understanding of our free gift of grace, mainly because there is a foe named Satan who will prod us just enough for us to think the false self works (oh snap to the double entendre!).
The main way Satan does this is by telling us that we must earn our salvation. We must perform well or else God will not keep loving us. Paul writes:
This is the only thing I want to find out from you: did you receive the Spirit by the works of the Law, or by hearing with faith? Are you so foolish? Having begun by the Spirit, are you now being perfected by the flesh? (Galatians 3:2-3)
And then this guy John writes (on behalf of Jesus):
You have persevered and have endured hardships for my (Jesus') name, and have not grown weary. Yet I hold this against you: You have forsaken your first love. (Revelation 2:3-4)
We keep falling into the trap of performance, and the video at the beginning captures that well. We had watched it in class and talked about the message it was sending; to earn respect (or love) was only through winning. And yet the discussion was followed up with the important question, "Who won the NBA championship 3 years ago?" No one could answer, even though that was only three seasons past.
We run in our squirrel cage, thinking the constant squeaking of the wheel of our achievements is a verification of our reality and worth.. The false self, sensing its fundamental unreality, begins to clothe itself in myths and symbols of power. Since it intuits that it is but a shadow, that it is nothing, it begins to convince itself that it is what it does.**
We talked about how much we really can't do anything on our own. It's why Jesus came. But it also extends into the reasons behind His baptism--that only He could fulfill the Law for us. This was mind-boggling! Why would Jesus need to be baptized after all? John the Baptist was baptizing for the repentance of sins, yet we know Christ to be blameless. Or how about the fact that even our prayers do not come from us, but from the workings of the Holy Spirit?
Yet we still do things. How do we prove our faith except through works? An important time to clarify.
Jesus said, "If you love me, you will obey my commands." (John 14:15)
He did not say, "If you obey my commands, I [Jesus] will love you." This is a logical fallacy. While let's say, there is no cloud in sight therefore it must not be raining, we could not say it is not raining therefore there is no cloud in sight. Our actions come in response to the recognition of our true self. We are children of God who are unconditionally loved by the Father. How then, could we not obey Him?
Works are done not to earn this salvation, but works are our effort (albeit weak) to love Him back. The battle resides in where our motivations lie behind the things we do. The crazy thing with all of this, too, is that when we become the new creation, Christ calls us toward rest, not work (read the Matthew 11:28 verse again). Really, He just wants us to be with Him, to walk with Him, as it was originally intended. Remember? Remember the intimacy that Adam and Eve had in the garden? Remember Enoch, who walked with God?
But the further away we get from the original plan, the harder it can be to remember, eh? It's when we resort back to the squeaky wheel mentality, "Well if I just do this, then I'll feel like I'm worth something."
Christ is calling us to just be. He has given us gifts and talents, dreams and desires, and the hope is for them to manifest so fully in our lives that we get lost in being. In being with Him, in knowing Him well..
I don't know how to conclude this, because there is so much that can be said. Hopefully this was enough to get the conversation/thinking started. Maybe you can understand why, too, I love this class so much!
* The Transformation of the Inner Man.
** Merton's Palace of Nowhere.
1 comment:
funny... I was sitting here enjoying your comments thinking Spurs baby!! I know it is not the point great post
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