Influences

For this second snow day, I ended up watching two Grey's Anatomy episodes (I did much more than that, don't you fret!). They were just reruns from this season I'm guessing, but I was reminded of my times in college when I first got into the show. Season one was incredible, and it was so fun to watch with Luke, Janna and Tim. I lasted about halfway through season three, mainly because I watched with my neighbor at the time, a gal named Ariel. :)

What I remember thinking a lot about this show, and twas my main reason for abandoning it, was that the advice on relationships was horrendous. I mean, we, America, or mainly girls, like that don't we? We get sucked into all of the television drama. There's a reason soap operas are still alive and well today.

Yet as I watched, I recognized too how small their world was. The second episode consisted of bringing in the cast from the sister show, Private Practice, to get more viewers (and using Taye Diggs is just cheap I tell you!). The characters all seemed to have a complicated relational history. If I remember correctly though, some of the characters come from New York, some are now in Seattle, and the rest are in L.A. How can there be so much relationship stress among them? How come they all keep dating each other? How can they be so calm around each other when half of them cheated on the other half (or something to that effect)?

I think this unreality stuff is getting to me in how I see it affect others. I've had a lot of conversations with students lately (yes, mainly girls) about how they do the boyfriend-girlfriend thing. What I seem to be hearing is that it's okay to cheat, it's okay to have friends with benefits, and it's okay to dress immodestly.

How can I forget the reaction when I told a few gals to stop talking about the things they were talking about? I told them, "Look, I have close friends who struggle with pornography. You have no idea what the boys in this room are struggling with, and you have no idea how even the words that you are using will affect their minds."

One girl said, "Well, I had an argument for you, until I heard that.."

I had asked another girl on a separate occasion what was the point of dating. She had shrugged. "I've never really thought about it before."

There are students who send texts about who they just made out with; there is pride in the guys' eyes when they start talking about how many girlfriends they have had.

What I think I'm seeing is that these television shows and movies (and I'll throw music in there too) are getting to us and making it seem like selfishness is okay. Kiss who you want, they tell us. Divorce if you want, etc. etc. And yet, it's not just t.v. shows either. I see teenagers and peers gathering information on how to do relationships from people who have no love for Christ.

It's that last line that's critical, because we do not know what love is apart from Christ. "We love, because He first loved us." True love has more to do with sacrifice than we're willing to admit, and a lot of us are afraid to lay down our life for someone else, whatever that may entail. But if you want what's real, that's what it's about. Christ wouldn't have died if that weren't true.

So I guess my plea for myself and for others is to pay attention to good examples, and most of all The good example. Let us take everything told to us with a grain of salt, and continue the discussion on relationships with other believers--young, old, widowed, and so on. Thank you Merge, for starting this topic up for me again, by the way. It is peanut butter jelly time! ;)

Snow day in the hizzouse

This is what I woke up to yesterday. You can't tell that it's snowing, but it continued all day, and in fact is snowing still. The students got the day off, and I was jealous of them. I began to make a list of the things I wanted to accomplish in the day (particularly work stuff), only to get a call 5 min later saying the office would be closed yesterday and today. I might have done a little celebration dance..

I mean, I would still get some basic things done, but overall, I spent the day doing other things.

I did not spend the day driving around anywhere. Aww.. Henderson looks so cute.

I did spend the day studying a lot 'o' German, and I read part of my most recent graphic novel called "The Dark Knight Returns." It's pretty dark, but has a lot of things to say about how the media affects our view on criminal activity. I've also had the chance to continue pondering the vigilante idea. A junior high student had posed the question during the all-nighter about what we should have done with Hitler (I used the blog as a basic outline of what I wanted to say). Great question, and I still don't know. I also note that this is the third graphic novel of the year.

In addition, I made a good old fashioned tuna sandwich for lunch; I wrote a letter to Lexie; I took a nap; I watched most of game one of the World Series (major kudos to Lee for his performance).

After dinner was when some of the craziness began. We invited the neighbors over and played a 2 hour game of charades. Here is Noah (my newest brother) getting ready to perform:

The best part, however, is when Kristy, aka Miss Sassy, tried to get the adult team (for some reason I wasn't included on this team. lol) to guess Ozzy Osbourne. Couldn't get more ridiculous than that!!

Turns out too, that her husband Ralph's first language is German, so he got to help me with some of my pronunciation questions (words like unternehmungslustiger and selbstverstandlich. Yeah.. exactly.). And speaking of German, my parents moved yesterday. I got the call from them right before they were getting on the plane. Insane.

Now.. what to do with snow day two??

Poor man's diet

I've thought about this post for over a year now. I guess when you come to a point where you know you're going to be poor for a long time (perhaps your whole life), you have to make sure you live smart.

The pastor at Merge gave some great advice yesterday. He said that you should never depend on two incomes. Not because the wife is not allowed to work, but because you can't count on the changes that may happen in your life. For one, people get sick, they get injured all the time. Plans constantly change. People lose jobs, and often when you least expect it. I guess I never thought of it that way before.

And maybe it's not even just a matter of being able to live off one income, but being able to live off less than that. Is it possible that we make too much? Is it possible that we rely too much on credit--essentially on the things we don't have?

Like the SNL skit says, "Stop spending money you don't have." There are sacrifices you have to make. The things you had before, even things that didn't cost that much, gotta go. For me, that was Wendy's, which is why I loved the fact that my grandparents gave me a gift card last Christmas that lasted a long time. I mean, I can reimburse a lot of my meals through youth ministry, but I can't bank on that (haha. "bank."). I also have given up on concerts. The cool thing is though this might be for quite awhile, it might also just be for a season. Besides, I have another trick up my sleeve..

Save. Save. Save. The saying goes that a person is two paychecks away from being homeless. Now while I don't always believe that homelessness is a bad thing (Jesus had no place to rest His head), it's more of an issue when others are involved. Particularly families. Most particularly children. We should be diligent--hmm, maybe I should just end that sentence there. But we should be diligent about setting aside a certain amount that we make each month for emergency. We can't always do that, but we should be prepared to when we can. And I must clarify that I'm not talking about hoarding (no "eat, drink and be merry" sort of thing), I'm talking about preparing for those times you can't control. Or maybe even setting aside money that God might want you to give to someone else.

Is it possible that we make too much in order to give more? I think this is more than possible. To whom much is given, much is expected (though I will say I don't think this just applies to money).

Phew. I feel like I'm all over the place. Here's the beauty of being poor. You get to have fun in all sorts of ways. As of late, I've had a lot of game nights. This has included Mao, most recently Set, and Rummikub, as featured below.Game nights are great because of how interactive they are, although sometimes I will get a little too into it. Hey, at least I can admit it, right? lol. There's also the simple joys afforded (man, I'm full of them today) by a walk around the neighborhood, or reading a book, or cooking, or learning a new language, or I dunno.. playing an instrument.. I could keep going. And interestingly enough, the more I do these things, the more I want to do them because of how much rest and peace they give me.

I was reading Philippians and I noticed that the "I can do all things" verse comes after an explanation of being content in all circumstances--in having much or in having little. It's not a matter of being able to always find success in life "through Christ who strengthens me", but a matter of learning how to be cool with however much food you ate for dinner. As Mama T (as Kayanne calls her) said, "Look, the Father takes care of the lilies and the sparrows, He'll take care of you."

The most spiritual thing I can do

As I'm typing this I'm yawning. I honestly don't know why I'm still up, but I figured while I was, I might as well type my initial thoughts concerning the junior high all-nighter. And listen to some John Mayer, for those of you who really want to know.

First off, it was so much fun. There were so many silly moments, so many moments of utter chaos, and so many moments of simply not knowing what to do. But it all worked out, and I live to tell the tale!

General schematics: students arrived Friday night where we played a lot of Guitar Hero (on second thought, I never got around to actually playing. oops) and some dodge ball before a worship session where I got to talk. Then we played Ooga Booga, and followed that up with about three hours of Communist Church. Though for the politically correct, it's called Persecuted Church. Then I brought Extreme Days which made for the perfect, "let's fall asleep," segue. Early morning of pancakes by Kurt before another worship session in which Kendra spoke, and then followed that up by a coat drive to help out our local elementary school families. Then major clean up. Then crashing at home. ahhh..

I learned a few things about the way I do ministry. The first is to note that I put a lot of stock in my student leaders. This is a good thing, because I feel like it is a chance to show that no one should look down on them because they are young, that they should be (or strive to be) trustworthy, that they are capable of being leaders. The problem comes when I don't nurture this leadership well. I saw many of the junior high students sitting by themselves, or hanging out with the same people most of the time. I need to be better at encouraging our leaders to not just see their presence there as enough. I want them to know that especially in ministry, we have to befriend these students, and not let a single one not feel loved. One of the purposes of using student leaders is to shorten the age gap between people like me and these 13 and 14 year olds. High school students can relate a lot better to the issues that I've been a decade removed from, not to mention the changes in societal pressures. So while I can, and do, go to the students who are quietly by themselves, it can't always be me.

I also want these student leaders to recognize that junior high ministry is all about awkward, and we have to be a lot more willing to make a fool of ourselves for the sake of the students feeling the community we strive for. I want to chant "ooga booga ooga booga" right now..

In addition to this, I have seen the need to continue to not have a tight reign over the moments when I give leadership over. I think this is easier for me, but the harder part comes when I need to help the leaders self-evaluate. To say, "You did great with this aspect, but what if..." or "I think you could improve in this way." My hesitations have to do with timing, and not sounding too critical.

Secondly, I find myself wobbling. There's a huge part of me that gets excited about going deeper with junior high. We can't underestimate them! I protest. We can challenge them, they can handle it! But then there's this fact that they have soooooooooooo much energy. One kid, whom I love, Kameron, is a fantastic example of being unceasingly energetic. I feel like I should nickname him Questions, as he's always wondering about what we are doing next. Junior high ministry must provide an outlet for this energy, not for the sake of fun, but for the sake of re-emphasizing community (one of my favorite words as of late, can you tell?). In other words, I wobble, trying to figure out when one or the other is best according to the needs of the students.

And finally (for now), I really love sleep. When some of the chaos happened due to some people unexpectedly showing up for a few hours in the evening, it probably would have been better for me to have gotten a better nap before the event. I know that in part I reacted negatively. I wonder if I should have spent more time in solitude before reacting even. In fact, during a game of CC, I "hid" in the gym for awhile just to pray and be still (Funny side story, a few students came into the gym, walked right by and never saw me. They said, "No one is ever in the gym during this game. It's like the safest place to go." Little did they know... ). I still don't know the correct response to the stress that was caused by these people coming, but the main point is we learn to roll with the punches in ministry.

Back to the sleep thing, I'm gonna take care of that now. It is the most spiritual thing I can do after all. In the right context, that is (thanks, Josh).

We do not need another vigilante

The world is undoubtedly full of injustice. The first things that come to mind for me are the extreme things like child soldiers in Africa, girls forced to live in brothels in India, the problems of poverty and aids. There is also common crime, so to speak, such as drugs, domestic violence, rape, murder, robbery, etc. etc. I don't exactly know how to categorize such things well, but I define injustice as an action that causes undeserved hurt of some kind (physical, emotional, mental).

In an imaginary world, we call for justice through the help of the superheroes. We pick them because they have abilities that are super human, meaning they can help us not only moments after we cry out for help (especially if we're a girl name Lois Lane), but also because their abilities allow them to overcome whatever evil may come our way. Right?

We love Superman's ability to fly and to hear us wherever in the world we may be; we love Wolverine's invincibility; the Flash's speed; Wonder Woman's ability to stop bullets with her arm bands. We may also love the fact that the actors that play these characters are good looking. I'm just sayin..

Something that is also true of many of the superheroes is the hedge of protection that they keep over a certain group of people. Superman watched over Metropolis for the most part, and Batman took care of Gotham City. Similarly, the Lord watched over the Israelites, and the stories from Scripture show time and again how He labored to save them not only from surrounding nations, but also from themselves.

For instance, the Lord used people called judges to save them. In fact the pattern of that book goes something like this: Israel sins, bad things happen, they cry out to God, he sends them a judge (check out the stories of Ehud and Deborah) who saves the day, Israel is happy. Lather, rinse, repeat.

But when Jesus comes much later, the story takes a dramatic turn. Jesus says a couple (understatement) of dramatic things:

"You have heard that it was said, 'Eye for eye, and tooth for tooth.' But I tell you, Do not resist an evil person. If someone strikes you on the right cheek, turn to him the other also."

"You have heard that it was said, 'Love your neighbor and hate your enemy.' But I tell you: Love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you."

You see, our superheroes don't follow these ideas. When they go against violence, they are usually using violence. I have never seen a superhero turn the other cheek. He/She usually punches back, and much harder. And we get excited about the violence too, don't we? I loved as a kid watching the old Batman series, whenever Batman would punch a bad guy, and the screen would say POW! or KAZAAM! The best parts of modern day superhero movies after all, are the fight scenes.

There's a great scene in Batman Begins. It's when Bruce Wayne has finished his training to become a leader of the League of Shadows. But in order to prove his devotion to justice, as spoken by the man who trained him, Bruce must kill a man who is guilty of murder. Bruce is handed the sword, but refuses it.

He is told, "Your compassion is a weakness that your enemies will not share."

"That's why it's so important," Bruce responds. "It separates us from them."

Jesus is teaching a new way full of compassion, mercy and grace that Bruce is getting to here. It is so different from before. We must come to understand that ultimately, violence begets only more violence. We can not overcome evil with evil; evil can only be overcome with good.

In the real world, there was a man named Dietrich Bonhoeffer. He's a Christian dude who lived during World War 2 time in Germany (the name makes that pretty clear). As a Christian, he believed that what Adolf Hitler was doing was wrong in every sense, and I agree with him. Bonhoeffer was involved in several assassination attempts on Hitler that failed. It is said that after one of the attempts, Hitler told his office assistant that because of his survival, he knew for sure that what he was doing was blessed by God. The use of evil (murder) to overcome the evils of Hitler was used as more motivation for Germany's Chancellor to continue in his evil! (That's a lot of evil) *

Our superheroes have a problem too. When they use their power and strength, it means the next guy has to be bigger and badder than the one before. Remember the time when Mr. Incredible worked on the island?

What would happen if we turned the other cheek? Someone suggested that in the act of turning, the person is forced to look into our eyes. What a way to stop someone in their tracks if we should also say, "Forgive them Father, for they know not what they do"!

And loving our enemy? What does that mean? We aren't just to tolerate him/her/them, but really love them, really pray for them? How?

We easily forget that we were once enemies of God. And instead of fighting us, He gave us this baby named Jesus (ooh..scary!). He had no beauty or majesty to attract us to Him, Scriptures tell us (so much for casting a supermodel for that movie role). And this Jesus would live the perfect life, only to experience the pain and suffering that was the most unjust of all.

When Jesus looked at the crowds (his enemies, or you can just insert your name here), the first reaction is compassion. In other words, He understands our humanity better than ourselves. We are to live in the same way. I could go into the fact that our fight is not against flesh and blood, but maybe we first need to wrap our minds around the idea of pacifism according to Christ. Do we realize that we are strongest when we are on our knees? Do we recognize that Christ was exhibiting not only the most love, but also the most power by allowing himself to be murdered upon the cross?

Our lives are complicated amidst a broken world. And I confess, this is probably a lot easier for me to say having grown up in suburban America. Nonetheless, if we are to be the light of the world, we are not to be the next Justice League of America (or Watchmen, if you want to go there). We are to be full of compassion and love toward our enemies, because that is exactly what separates us from them.

*For more on Dietrich's complicated, but way cool life, click here.
p.s. The Civil Rights Movement of the 1960s is an excellent example of what Jesus calls us to. see Rosa Parks, see Martin Luther King, Jr., see The Little Rock Nine.

Guess what

It's snowing.

Henderson has reached the 50K mile mark.

I had Fusion students read Matthew 5-7 on their own and the response was awesome.

I'm drawing again.

53 days till Germany.

The story of Jacob and Esau gets me every time.

Cookies make everyone happy. Unless they're allergic.

Live in the tension of the question

Sundays continue to be my favorite days. Usually they include Sunday afternoon naps, though recently not as often. What they have typically been for me as of late, are challenging. I start with the GROW class, then go to High Impact and end with Merge. I am thus engulfed in solid teaching which requires me to think and live differently. I love it, but it doesn't stop it from being hard.

Not to mention too, I got to watch two of our students' hockey games yesterday (is that the right placement for the apostrophe?), which were so entertaining! Go Marcus and go Kyle!

So let's begin with GROW. The title was "Obstacles of Awareness--Destructive Doubt." As I've mentioned before, we are discussing what it means to be more aware of God's presence in our daily lives. Sometimes, doubt can get in the way of that.

Now, doubt isn't completely a bad thing. We called doubt a human problem due to our inability to have perfect knowledge. Only God is all-knowing, and since we are not God, we could never know everything with 100% certainty. Doubt is helpful, as my host mom explained, when it pushes us forward. It becomes a problem when we just shove it under the rug and choose not to deal with it. To choose to remain in comfortable ignorance (is it really that comfortable?). When working through doubts, similar to what I had mentioned before with arguments, one has the chance to figure out whether they're in the relationship with God for real or for their own personal gain.

First let's get some of the misconceptions concerning Christian doubt out of the way:

1. Christian doubt is uncommon. (Amen and amen)
   
2. True believers never experience doubt. Doubt is not the opposite of faith, but it does affect faith.
   
3. Christian doubt is always bad. (See previous paragraph again, and then continue)
   

We looked to the complaints of the Israelites in the desert in Numbers 20:1-5. Our Bible study leader pointed out that the mentality had become, "God what have you done for me lately?" Let us remember that the Israelites were in the desert for about 37 years now (only 3 more to go, right?). God had provided for them so far, but now they were thirsty, and restless.

Some of the ways we talked about finding the antidote for doubt was to look at the evidence. It made me think of whether the US went to the moon or not. After having taken a class about every Apollo mission (as well as the Mercury missions before that) to the moon, after studying moon rocks in comparison to Earth rocks, after watching hours of video and reading over a thousand pages of personal accounts.. I am convinced that Neil Armstrong walked upon the surface of the moon. The same should be said of the Israelites. After being delivered from the Egyptians with more stuff than they had ever had, after walking on dry land through the Red Sea, after manna and quail, you would think that they could trust the Lord to provide for them. In fact, reading the rest of that small section in Numbers is worth mulling over.

Can the same be said of our own lives? For me, after seeing God restore familial relationships even after things like infidelity and murder, after He provided (and continues to provide) finances and friendships, after seeing people healed, after witnessing miracles, after seeing the desires in my own heart change from the natural worldly desires, how could I not continue to put my trust in Him?

And even if he doesn't provide? He is still God. As I think back to my time at EBF, I will always remember the phrase, "We know that our reward is God, and that is enough." Also, read this before moving on, paying close attention to verse 18.

All this to say, when we come to the point where we are demanding God to do something for us now, then that is a problem. We were reminded that even when people had doubts in the Bible, God rarely gives a direct answer. Sometimes He takes lots of time before providing one. Often, the main thing is to keep our eyes on Him. Take this quote:

The quest for meaning can be extremely frustrating at times even excruciating, precisely because it does not lead to ready answers, but to new questions.*

And this one:

Sometimes in living the questions, answers are found. More often, as our questions and issues are tested and mature in [our] solitude [with God], the questions simply dissolve...God does not solve [all] our problems or answer all our questions, but [he] leads us closer to the mystery of our own existence where all questions cease.**

There are three types of doubt. Factual doubt, or not believing certain facts about God (such as Jesus Christ's existence), is combatted by seeking truth in study and teaching. We are to seek with an open heart and trust in the Holy Spirit to help verify truth. Emotional doubt, or doubting based on feelings, is to be combatted with behavior change. We looked to C.S. Lewis' example of trusting in the power of anesthetics, but that at the time of the anesthetics being administered, he experienced childish panic. "While our reason appears to be ever so logical, requiring evidence, a little dose of feelings effectively topples the castle." We can also combat our nervous feelings about whether God is really who He says He is with Scripture. And finally, volitional doubt, or making a choice to simply not accept evidence, is combatted with choosing God and taking our thoughts captive.

What I liked most about this class was the acceptance of doubt. I was encouraged to affirm my searching and probing of the Lord, because in the end the Holy Spirit is more than capable to provide the answers, or sometimes more questions, that we need. This quote covers it well:

Painful questions must be raised, faced and lived. This means we must constantly avoid the temptation of offering or accepting simple answers, to be defenders of God, the Church, tradition, or whatever we feel called to define...The best guides are willing to be silent, yet present, and are comfortable with unknowing. God's Spirit is ultimately the sole source of spiritual guidance, comfort, and knowing.***

This is what it means to live in the tension of the question. Unlike humans, He can handle our doubts. It is better then, when we don't just let the doubts sit, but work through them. We can be more honest with others, as well as ourselves--we don't really know, but we won't let that stop us!

* Guiness, Oz. In Two Minds: the Dilemma of Doubt and How to Resolve It, quoted in Dealing with Doubt.
** Reasonable Faith
*** Dealing with Doubt

This little diddy is something Kendra and I worked on today in preparation for the super heroes overnighter we're having next weekend. I hope you like the end :).

"Because it's all about me"

Recently, Kendra and I have had a lot of joking moments where we turn the conversation (whatever it may be) back to ourselves. We always feel foolish for how often we talk about ourselves. Thus, in effort to turn this around, I would like to give a big fat congratulations to my bro-bro:
In April, he will be a father. They are hoping for a boy, as am I. Gotta groom a future pro baseball player, after all ;). But in all seriousness, I am looking forward to this next major step in his life!

My parents got to go to the U2 concert tonight. How fun is that? How fun is getting to live overseas, as they will be doing by the end of this month?

Also, more proof that Heroes is a wonderful show, Milo Ventimiglia had a short film that he directed played during the commercial break. It was about a guy who does a lot of good things for people, although he doesn't get noticed. The underlying theme is that it's our responsibility to keep helping others, even if there's nothing in it for us. Here's to thinking more about the other person, and not ourselves. That's all I got for tonight.

Lost in thought

I don't know how many times I've wanted to exclaim on here how amazing the mountains look each day. I keep telling myself that I'll take a collection of pictures to put up on here, but I always miss it. Then today as I drove by Standley Lake, I was overwhelmed by the beauty therein. The lake had fog all over it's surface, and yet the green of the water behind it was literally shining through! Spectacular. Good work, God. Too bad there are still no pictures, but I thought writing it down might be beneficial in some way.

I was at Barnes and Noble today looking at some language books. I came close to getting the newest edition of the 501 German verbs, but instead just perused the grammar sections inside. I'll stick to my free cd's for now (thanks, library). Plus, I have my two most important phrases so far, "Wo das Toillette ist?" and "Das tut mir leid." :)

Currently, I'm obsessed with the Fray's cover of "Heartless." I know I mentioned it in an earlier post, but ever since the official music video has come out, I am mesmerized.

On the topic of music, there was a rerun of the 2009 VMAs that I watched at the Thomas' house (where I've been for the week). I didn't see the whole thing, but I watched it as pop culture (particularly for teens) homework. Last year I had made comments about the show: about how annoyed I was by the host; about how easily we are drawn in to the lifestyles of the rich and famous (to steal the line from Good Charlotte); about how much rap music steals from other songs (hmm.. touche?).

Interestingly, a lot of this year's show was reminiscent of last year's. Two of the songs up for awards were performed for the first time at last year's show. Pink performed again, though in quite a new way that I give her props for--still, I wouldn't have minded if she wore more clothes..

Eminem won an award, and I thought about how much I would like to meet that guy. Then I watched half of his video that won, and decided nevermind. I'm intrigued simply by what I have heard about his life, and how he still has two daughters that he apparently makes sure to keep away from his music. Maybe the person I really want to meet is Lady Gaga. She wore an outfit in which you couldn't see her face! It was quite strange. Or maybe I want to hear from Kanye. Nah, he talks plenty on his own.

I guess I'm just lost in the idea that these people started out so much like us, didn't they? They had a family, went to school, and then became famous. I know they worked a lot at that last part, and that a lot of the stupid things they do now is all part of the scheme of staying in the limelight. But sometimes it's just so hard to remember this.

I'm thinking too, of a gal I went to high school with who is currently on the rise to Broadway fame. It's weird to think that I knew her and had some really good conversations with her about life and God. I also remember watching her play one of the leading roles in the play "Ragtime" and thinking, "Man, she's gonna be famous some day."

But then I think of the tension of being famous and changing the world. And there I get lost again..

A group of us watched a movie last night after the soccer game (oh, and after some delicious dessert!!). The premise is a couple trying to find where they should settle for the first few years of life with their impending child. While vastly inappropriate (unexpectedly so, I might add), there was a lot of truth. I hope I never cease to see truth amidst a secular world, and to know that it all comes from our loving Father who is continually poking us to see if we'll notice.

Preach it

This was posted on Derwin Gray's (you know, the evangelical linebacker) facebook page. I absolutely love it. Steve Harvey, not known for his belief in Christ, does a pretty good job amidst a secular audience. And their response is sweet too.

Can I also say that this is a taste of the coming High Impact series, Jesus is Legend. I have the privilege of starting us off this Sunday by talking about Jesus being Messiah. I am stoked!

That's how you know

Yesterday in the adult Sunday School class (called GROW), we talked about God's presence. We first noted truths pointed in Scripture about God's transcendence as well as His immanence.

tran·scen·dent : being beyond comprehension; : transcending the universe or material existence
im·ma·nent : being within the limits of possible experience or knowledge

It's like the argument that Jesus was 100% God as well as 100% man, or the "already but not yet" concept in sanctification. The verses are sweet, so I'll go ahead and list them for your viewing pleasure:

Transcendence verses: John 8:23; Psalm 113:5-6; Isaiah 6:1-6; 55:8-9
Immanence verses: Job 12:10; Acts 17:25, 28; Hebrews 1:3; Ephesians 4:6

Now it comes down to trying to be more aware of His presence while balancing these two qualities. You see, we continued in the class to discuss the paradox of awareness:

"The ancient spiritual writers noticed in themselves and many of their committed disciples the experience in which at an earlier time when less mature, that God seemed very close [consolation] and a later on when one was more mature, that God seemed less close [desolation] in experience...this set of experiences puzzled them."*

con·so·la·tion : for the "beginner," is often the filling of the Spirit ahead of one's character with purpose to encourage faith and reinforce the doing of spiritual disciplines
des·o·la·tion : may be a sign of God withdrawing "infant consolation" and is according to a person's actual character. This experience acts as a mirror to show the reality of one's heart, one's true motivations. This is not a withdrawing of the presence of the Spirit, but rather the Spirit drawing near in truth apart from a feeling, to show the person the true state of some vice elements in the character, of how the person is not truly filled with the Spirit in those places of the heart, and how they need more deeply to depend on God.

Further discussion led to using the metaphor of the parent-child relationship. A child without its parent is helpless, and we are sure to feed and coddle him/her until they are ready to do some things on their own. Not that the parent is then absent from that relationship, but plays a different, more mature role. And as married couples fill the GROW class, they discussed how it is like the beginning of a relationship. There is romance, a woo-ing involved, much like when Christ first fascinates us to follow Him. Over time though, His role with us is different. We are not always to rely on feelings (similar to romance), but on the knowledge of Him.

As I internalized this, I recognized some things in the marriage relationship. Obviously, I don't really know what I'm talking about because most of this is observation, but I hope you'll hear me out.

It's a great thing when married couples fight. It's a great thing when they have times that are hard. As one person pointed out, "You will probably end up in the desert."

What do I mean? A relationship becomes more real in those moments. Coming from someone who hasn't been in too many arguments with her friends, I worry a little. However, I have had some pretty anger-filled conversations with God, and have cried a lot. It is in these moments, although usually in retrospect, that I recognize the most growth. And after doing some self-refection time in a former GROW class, I realized that it was the times when I felt most alone in which I felt the closest to God. What came out of those harder moments was a testing as to why I was really in a relationship with Him in the first place.

In the afternoon time, I ended up watching most of Enchanted on tv. Here comes the connection of the title and picture, are you ready for it? Me neither :P. So they sing that song "How Does She Know," and it's all about the things that a guy does for a girl as proof that he loves her. They are little things--leaving a note to tell her she is on his mind, sending flowers, taking her out dancing--but they are things that require sacrifice. It's not typical for a guy to think of this stuff for someone else, mainly because they are, well, girly. It is also hard to keep up these efforts for the long haul. The things we do as an effort not necessarily to prove our love for God, but out of (hopefully) a desire to love and know Him better, aren't exactly things we normally seek out either. I.E. serving other people and not ourselves, spending long hours of silence, reading an ancient book, spending time confessing with one another our deepest and darkest sins.. the list is exhaustive. And what usually happens is that we set about to do these things, and more painful truths about our hearts and our needing to change are made visible. These disciplines reveal to us how much further we have to go. ("So close.. and still so far.."*** if you will)

After all, if we made marriage the end goal, we'd end up like these two who say, "Okay.. now what?":
It's why Christ tells us to go make disciples, not converts. Yes, that "first love's fire" is pretty cool, and feels all warm and fuzzy on the inside, but it's not all there is to our relationship with Christ. It's hard to accept this. It's also hard to put this into practice. But if there's anything to comfort you, may it be the great cloud of witnesses who surround you and say that it's worth it. May it be Christ, who promises to be the perfecter of our faith, particularly in times of desolation.

May you remember how big God truly is, and yet how personal He desires to be with you. May you become more and more aware of His constant presence in your life. May you also continue to seek Him out daily, pursuing the uncomfortable in order to know Him well.

*Coe, John. "Spiritual Theology: A Theological-Experiential Methodology for bridging the Sanctification Gap."**
**I didn't read this folks, this was in the notes from the class. I wish I was that smart!
*** lyrics from Jon McLaughlin's "So Close" that is sung near the end of Enchanted.

Oink, oink

Not reminiscent of "Old MacDonald" or anything, but I do believe that I am now the recipient of the dreaded Swine Flu.

The symptoms are there: sore throat, coughing (thankfully not too much, yet), and the shivers (a lot of those, even when wearing a tshirt, sweater and sweatshirt over that!). I guess that's what you get when you hang out with the sickies at fall retreat. :P

Prayers are welcome! Love and peace to you.

A good combo

Let's establish that He's Israel's King
So in Matthew 1 and 1 and on to verse 17,
We see His lineage and trace way back into time
That legally He was fine in the Davidic line
And genealogically He's still King of the Jews
Cause the Book of Luke exposes genetical clues
See a true King though He didn't do it in the physical,
He brought a new covenant to free 'em in the spiritual.

And after sometime, Wise men from the east came looking
For the new born king in the streets
I know some of you dudes may cruise a 4Runner
But Christ had the dude He used as a forerunner
And no promoter gunna cut it like the John the Baptist.
You need publicity stunts so you datin' an actress
A real King has somebody bringin' the news
That his kingdom's ahead and they ain't fit to lace up his shoes
So tell me who's the one anointing all these so called kings?
They all self proclaimed and man, that's a dangerous thing.

from Lecrae's After the Music Stops album. (Wish I could say I wrote those words.)

PLUS:

It started from a conversation with Ev when we were leaving for Glendo in June. I still don't know how to balance politics and God, but as you can see, it's on my mind a lot lately. As Rachel and I mapped out a couple weeks ago, we've got it all wrong trying to be like other nations by going and establishing a king for ourselves (We went through the kings and highlighted the few of the 40 who were actually doing right in the eyes of the Lord). Then Christ comes and talks about the kingdom of God and it just throws everything out of whack. His way is different, and as written in the first part of this book, "God would save the world through fascination, by setting up an alternative society on the margins of empire for the world to come and see what a society of love looks like."

Any way, the point was bringing these two things (the lyrics and the book) together and saying that my mind is overloaded and it is awesome!