Finances

You know what doesn't make sense? The way God provides.

The other day I realized I needed to purchase the front half of the tickets for getting to Cordoba. It's quite a journey when I need to go to Amsterdam first for a conference (though I suppose meeting up with NYC friends and then spending a week with the parents overseas also adds to it). Any way, what I'm trying to say is it isn't cheap.

Well, I've been praying over this transaction for awhile. I've been watching all the airline prices as they steadily drop, so that I can get the best deal. Thankfully with one generous gift from a church family, as well as some reimbursed purchases from the Denver Mission Trip, I thought that the time to buy was soon.

But it was a funny feeling. I just woke up with a compelling need to buy the plane tickets. I can't really explain it, but prayed a bit more and then went to double check that I had the funds for the purchase. If I didn't, then I had planned to take some out from savings for buffer. No big deal, except that it meant I would have to wait a couple more days for the transfer to come through.

Only, what did I find? Another generous gift! It wasn't from family, but it was from "family" if you catch my drift. And here's the kicker: the cost of the plane tickets were completely covered by this deposit!! Can you believe that? I was astounded and extremely grateful.

Because even in the midst of knowing you're supposed to be doing something, it's helpful to be encouraged along the way. Opposition is sure to come (and in some ways, has), but there are just those moments where you know what you're doing is right. Also, hard to explain, but the book of Nehemiah has been my point of reference.

In another small way, I had been given a cash gift which I used for gas and food with friends since I've gotten here. I just ran out of that cash, only to be given the exact same amount by another family friend.

Now, there's a point at which I wonder if I'm supposed to take this money. I'm always thankful, and I try not to take advantage of the givers, nor do I like spending the money unwisely.. but at some point does it become too much?

I think of a couple things. Of a Christian woman who felt called to walk across America. She had wanted to raise support for her journey, but the money didn't come. Compelled to go on any way, she promised God that she wouldn't look at her checking account during the entire walk. She would spend the night at churches and have plenty of conversations with folks, asking them to support, but never wanting to know how much she was given. It also wasn't her priority. Her priority for the walk was praying and telling others about Jesus. When her and her mom reviewed the finances for that summer, over $10,000 had gone in and out of the account.

I think also of how much I want to give back. But I don't have anything, other than my time, to give. And I try to make sure my motivation behind volunteer work, or things of that nature are not done for attention, but because I want to remember that God first gave his time and attention and love to me.

I'm hardly perfect with my motivations, but I think God's changing me. I'm looking forward to the times when I will get to support others even more, though I have to realize it probably won't be as much financially. It's encouraging to remember the gift of the widow in Luke 21.