Convenient

I have been convicted over and over again about my convenient relationship with Christ. I pray to Him when I need Him most. I get excited about Him when He's done something good for me.

And then I get angry when things don't go my way.

I was talking to Kendra this evening about the story of Elijah. There are a couple things I'd like to say about his story, but let me write about the one that relates to this now.

The story for now is of him running away from Jezebel. Note: Elijah ran into an old friend named Obadiah who was hiding 100 prophets of the Lord at the time. Note 2: Elijah just served about 500 prophets of Baal in a dancing contest. Just kidding. I was seeing if you were paying attention. But read here for the specifics on the truth. Continue: Elijah is running away for his life. He even has a little pouty moment that reminds me of Jonah chapter 4, where he asks God to take his life. He's done. And then Elijah ends up getting to meet God in a MIGHTY WIND! oh wait, not that. In an EARTHQUAKE!! nope. Not that way either. In a spectacular FIRE?!

False. In a gentle whisper.

Then Elijah says in I can only imagine a quiet whimper, "But I'm the only one left!" (remember note one)

Kendra and I realized that Elijah was very human. How comforting. A man of God who gets probably one of the coolest exits from this life known to man is so quick to forget his Maker. He's all good when he's dousing the altar in water, proving YAHWEH is Lord. He's confident with the widow and the eternal flour and oil jar. But when he gets to be alone, everything goes dark.

I spent a few moments in utter darkness before entering the Pace's home last evening. It reminded me of a faith crawl I had done in a natural cave in West Virginia a few summers ago. It's a scary place to be. It's sorta more convenient to rely on our own devices when we feel alone. It's less convenient to believe that God will make a way out for you when you don't see the exit sign.

I like what my friend Josh said in one of his podcasts. You always hear about the folks who give their tithe to the church and then suddenly get lots of return. They mention how they were nervous to give, but felt called to.. and then they win the lottery or something crazy.

And yet, he (and I) would love to hear the story of the person who gave despite not getting anything in return. The sheer faith in the advancement of God's kingdom was enough. And besides, the convenience of having money on this earth is so temporary.

I guess what I'm concluding is that I too am very human. I desire to trust God even when it's inconvenient in my life, on my time, etc. I just stink at it.